Last World Problems…

I have known people to have almost shared a used condom….LastWorldProblems….

My colleague once complained that the free condoms given out on Campus, which were Made in China, were for the Chinese and not Blacks because they didn’t fit and tore easily…gruesome as that joke was, it did explain to me what Last World problems are…

Today as I watched the News, Nodding Disease had been cubbed down, well, thanks mostly to some white philanthropists whilst Parliamentarians kept on asking for a pay rise and are arguing about the 39 billion shillings allocated to the health sector which am not sure at what stage it has reached now…

A 19 year old inherited the Parliamentary Seat/Role after her father’s passing on, and am wondering what criteria is being used to put people in parliament….I mean there is over 150 districts and they want to add some more apparently on the Job creation front…and she is the MP of a county. Do counties have MPs? Or Parish chiefs…

I sit here secluded in my confines, struggling to make ends meet, living on miserly allowances from small jobs, waiting to be paid for the big Ideas I have locked up in my head…

My parents are hard working, like any other, trying to make ends meet, with the fees, food and clothing piling up, and a bunch of succubuses/succubi or just plain succubus who I call my relatives are there mulching on these little funds…which brings me to this post’s aim….

THE MISGUIDED PERCEPTION OF GRANDER THE POOR AFRICAN HAS OF THE RICH ONE…

My relatives have gotten the impression that because my father drives a car, and my mother owns one too, that they are wealthy. They forget though, that the House in which he lives in is owned by the University and if they were to lay him off, he would be homeless…that he has a family of his own to feed…that after 20 years + of supporting them, they still are dependant on him…that he took them to school and drunk themselves silly…that the house he built in the village is his not theirs…that as much as he’s trying to live by example…they still have failed to get the point.

I was told that the reason many African parents had lots and lots of children was because of the Ugly Duckling Syndrome…that, yes,  many children may be ugly to raise, frustrate and may not exactly be of beauty but when they grow up, they in turn shall raise their parents hence become beautiful then.

Further more, if 1 out of the 7 children you had ever made it big, that there would be the success story the village will tell of…a Tale of promise and probably the hope that the more children you have, the higher your probability of having a successful child.

The only query with this ideal is that the remaining 6 become baggage for that one duckling to carry and with time, the beauty of the ugly duckling begins to fade, why, over dependency and milking of the little wealth it has. Forgive my use of many analogies and metaphors…but simply put;

The Ugly Duckling Syndrome is where an African Parent has enough children (usually above 5+) hoping that one will become successful and get them out of their misery, which never really works out that well.

Extended family is good, but that is if you actually have the potential and capacity to build something but in Africa’s case, where nepotism and tribalism are high, all businesses and jobs that involve family ultimately fail because they drain the few resources they have on misguided delusions of grander…a lack of professionalism to say.

I dont know where am going with this, but bare with me…

I have a cousin staying at our place, and I dont mind, but for someone ( 25+ year old) to hopelessly sit on the television the whole WEEK and claim they are jobless or are looking for a job doesn’t sound right.

For a parent (aunt/uncle) to tell their daughter to look for a “husband” who can provide just puts to shame this African ideology that seems to be everywhere. Young girls going in for loveless marriages just for the sake of wealth, young girls going in for already married men, just for the sake of wealth…this cant continue…again, misguided delusion to grander…

Anyway, that again is not the reason I type out this long post…

I am frustrated by the government…why, well, there is a lot of talk, and we the people suffer…

Recently I was arguing with a Doctor, telling him that the Ministry of Health has the money, is given money but its not run by a Doctor so how do you expect a politician to assume they understand what you are going through…It does make sense. Why should non-qualified people do jobs for the qualified people. How does a non Doctor run a ministry of Health? Hospitals, Clinics and Dispensaries are run down…labour and man power low, angry and unpaid…patients sleeping on floors cracked and stinking with secretion of patients that have splayed in that same spot before…why?

TASO closed.

TASO closed.

THE AIDS SUPPORT ORGANISATION CLOSED…WHY? Lack of funding! I am speechless and for the people out there who it helped, thank God, for those who it was supposed to help, why not empower people willing to create and make change. When I got wind of this, I remember a friend who recently passed on, and how he could have been helped but because some inconsiderate fools run the system, such is not the case…

So, my parents are well to do…own some little real estate deep down in the villages. It brings some thing to at least feed and provide for the family. Recently we were called by Town clerk to pay property tax. Surprise surprise, that is what I was. On inferring as to why we should pay now when we last paid years ago, the gentleman couldn’t explain. In my mind, he looked like he wanted a free allowance. This was money that had never been accounted for…never budgeted and if paid, will never have been ‘received’ and again I wonder why this continues to happen…

Reminds me of the time I was recently confronted by the police. I showed him the relevant documents and the car was in mint condition…and that’s is when I got to know about his sick child, bedridden wife, and no food…I ask, how does all that concern me or my proper driving? Or how is it connected to the  me driving properly on the roads…

Anyways, hit my 1000 word count…and well, I didn’t want this to be any longer than it already has…but well, these are last World problems…doing the right thing now feels wrong…depending on your definition of right…

In a public lecture recently, my professor asked (after his tour to major cities around the world), why wasn’t Kampala and Uganda well developed and ‘ modern’ like the other cities?

My first answer was well, if the need arises, then maybe we shall develop. The simple basics of Cause and Effect —>>[Revolver 2005 – Jason Statham]

And as the discussion continued, I remembered one of my trips recently to Dubai (best one so far) and how on the streets I saw posters of the 2020 Expo…and in a conversation, a colleague had told me that that was the destination to be when that time came. In my mind, this expo was 8 years ahead…and I brushed it off then…

Suddenly it clicked…

When the discussion turned to what we needed to do, I quickly put up my hand…

All great cities have a vision. Look at the recently concluded London Olympics…a vision that started 5 years ago…Dubai, Abu Dhabi, Rio 2016, South Africa 2010….all great cities have vision…maybe that is what we nee…

The professor nodded, and in him, I think the light bulb clicked…

So…maybe we need little visions of our own…little cities in our heads we have to go to, to be like in a couple of years…maybe that is the change we need…maybe thats the change we are looking for…the power to have VISION…

Lastly…#LastWordProblems – The lack of a vision and vision…

Peace…

Quote…Before tabling an argument, know, know what lies on both sides. Its important to be well informed on the side against you..information is all the power you need…

Religion isn’t a tool…its a belief system, so apart from praying, maybe working at doing something is all the prayer you need.

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Rumblings…

“Am I now a better writer?” A thought to myself…

“We are a couple now, and as your partner….” A word to people in relationships….

“Rumblings and musings that come in a curve and you make them straight as thought in words…” A word to all bloggers…

“When the mumbles come in curves yet I need them in a straight line. Envisaging thoughts accrued now crude…to the blog and beyond.” To those passionate about writing….

She said, “We are a couple now, and as your partner”….Well, I stopped listening after those words…

I hate it when I dont have constructive thought…thought that is taking my mind somewhere blissful….and of late, I haven’t had anything constructive cross my mind…

Friends…

We have them, we hate them, we like them, we roll with them. But unlike ladies, men dont have best friends, friends who come to our homes, eat our foods and call our parents aunt/uncle or even mum…we have friends who are in the right situation be it at the wrong time or wrong place. So, if as a man you cant have a best friend, can a lady be your best friend? Again, this here is a dilemma. Men seem to think women are there for coitus and emotiony stuff, no more no less….BUT, I beg to differ, find that woman/lady/girl friend who’s going to be your best friend and also be your partner in crime….

Relationships…

Like a connoisseur of the finest wines, be just that in your relationship. Thats all I can say. Am not about to give you relationship advice. I mean, its written all over the blog…

Work…

With all the stuff and craziness that goes through my mind, I find myself jobless. Doing miserly jobs that dont even earn a penny to a dollar. And finally, I now know how to use the phrase a ‘penny to a dollar’…

Movies…

Haven’t watched anything sensible and Expendables 2 wasn’t as exciting the second time when I watched it. The jokes were not exactly cracking…

Smart Phone…

Finally upgraded from a touch button to a touch screen. Exciting holding one, unexcited using one. I mean, being forced to charge the damn thing every after 6 hours is not what I signed up for. And yes, iPhone 5 is fake and pathetic. Why? Because all the iPhone users I know keep on reminding me on how good it is…and how exactly am I supposed to know…buy me one.

Sex…

!? I dont know. Should I insert Male here….

Gay…

I was hit on by a gay dude. Girl, [partner in crime] am I so damn hot I could compete with the sun. Ok, that there just sounded gay. But oh well…I love my lady….

Quote…

‘The rich and powerful take what they want, well, we take from the rich and powerful…’ Leverage…like any other series, just hit a mental snag in my head. I watched because well, watching the same old stuff is now boring…

Cartwheels…

Mental notes to myself… *cartwheels away*

Word count… 500…. *clicks publish*

Peace y’all…

Fear Is Like Fire

Fear is Like Fire – Fink…

What are we afraid of the most?

What are you afraid of the most?

I was once asked this question a couple of years ago.

I thought about it and after a couple of seconds, I said my Parents. I later thought about it, and in my head, I should have said God.

But, again, God is a parent. That one parent who we always go to irrespective of the scenario, religion or fear.

Listening to this song and I cant help but realise my past couple of months have been dominated by fear. Is it safe for me to do this? Every decision I have made, I made because I tried to eliminate the aspect of fear. If am not afraid, then I will do it, If I am afraid, then I wont do it.

Fear is a like fire, come watch it burn, you can watch it burn. Where is this fear? Is in our heads? Is it part of our body?

Well, if you trust yourself, then there’s no need to be afraid.

Dont let fear dominate you. Master it. And may the gods or God be with you.

The Love Bug…

Is it like the Lady bag?

Does it have red and black spots all over?

Why do you blush when it bites you?

Your obsession with this emotion, can it be cured?

The Love bug….

I come to you with relationship advice, not as an experienced relationship-er but rather, I see things…and  sometimes these things are important to note…so, here are my notes….

The Love Bug!

Am a big believer that when you fall in love, LOVE…dont go in with percentages, because well, you might leave on a percentage.

Am a big believer that love, though just a four letter word, seems to describe a dictionary of emotions…Its like the ultimate CAPSLOCK of emotions. When someone tells you they ‘honestly’ love you…you know they have skipped through a bunch of emotions and words that describe them to get there.

This love bug, how many times does it bite?

I know for a fact that men rarely say these things…they rarely are outspoken about their feelings but when he does, be it in the moment, they might sometimes mean it.

Men only say they love you if they want to sleep with you but on the occasion that they cant then they actually mean it. If he says it every morning and every night, its timetabled, he might do it to save his ass, but if it is random, out of the blue then maybe….

I know men to have fallen in love quickly…there immunity to the love bug is zero after the first bite…men’s love is physical, and relatively emotional. Physical why, well, they love people they need and want to be with….and if you dont fall in this category, you just might be a prostitute.

Unlike in women where the love comes after a lot of attention and coercing, with men, its all about the moment. Women love after a while, when they realise that the sorry bastard they are dating is actually there for the long haul…is haul right or should I say the long whole…men on the other hand…well, I cant tell…only said it to two women in my life, and one held me in chains and forced it out of me, and the other, well, I would have to kill you before I told…

The Love bug….

I know for a fact that people who have been in relationships longer have mastered the art, they have grown immune to the love bug, and sometimes feign they have been bitten by one just to get out of doing something or actually get into doing something…but worry not…those are fake love bugs…

The real love bug bites, and when it does, it makes the relationship a mutual understanding…based on values, desire and the need to progress with a person rather than digress into shenanigans…

Now, I haven’t mastered the art of loving…neither am I telling you am right, but am sure as hell not wrong…

When the love bug bites,

Hold onto that feeling….

Love is love. So, just Love….

Place Random Title Here

I have a lot to say….thats how most of my blog posts begin! Well, I might have, am not really sure how much I have though…

Blogging is fun, or it used to be when there was a gang of mafia running the blogsphere and we all wanted to join, and we read and commented, but times have changed.

So, its not like I care about my stats [statistics] but a few days ago, I woke up to 163 hits in one day. Now that took me aback! 163 hits means someone or some people read it that many number of times. But no, I checked again, and realised someone had actually opened each and every article from when I first posted to date. Now that was worrying. But I liked it, well, I hope they did find out about me or they know what I dont know about myself.

Thats beside the point. Today’s post was supposed to be dubbed ‘TGIF’! I mean, Thank God its Friday. Many people talk about it, but the irony is they thank him yet they prepare themselves to sin as the weekend approaches. The irony indeed. Again, am not here to castigate or hate or whatever it is you think am doing, am just putting to not. And why doesn’t opened have a double N?

Anyway, now to the main point, am grateful to my readers. Keep reading. Keep sharing, and one by one,  lets be the change we want to be.

You can also find me here The Crit  or here CK 

Am appreciative. Even for the hits, I know you are reading and I shall continue to write.

INJUSTICE!

I speak for the bush….

Anyone remember that poem? Well, I do. Just the title though. It was one of those ones where the metaphors and phonetics were on another level and given the fact that I read it during my teenage prime (Uganda’s case Senior Four/Form 4) I dont think I can remember.

But well, the title fits perfectly…I SPEAK FOR THE BUSH.

Well, if you have been closely following my blog, or if you haven’t, well, the predecessor to this article talks a lot about Lazy African Intellectual Scum…and I agree with the article totally and I feel that WE as an African people need to change. Then again, it recently dawned on me…not almost every intellectual scum that is African is lazy.

Take an example of Assoc. Prof. Philip Kwesiga, youngest Dean at 32 years of age, graduated with a first class, retained by the school to teach, and also surprisingly, my Father…this here is one hard working fella. He may not reflect it, sometimes passing off as aloof and a snob but am told by his students that he’s fun to listen too, a great orator and best of all, a good lecturer.

This besides the point, he recently applied for the post of Deputy Vice Chancellor Makerere, Finance and well, he was the best candidate after deliberation but due to his quiet and humble ways, a few people felt that that was not good enough for Makerere. That they needed someone who was all noise and noise. Well, I know him, soft spoken indeed, but he is quite stern when it comes to doing his business. When we heard of this news, well we were elated.

But recently, news trickled in that the Senate had refused to vote for this position, citing that again, they needed a noise maker. Well, that still wasn’t the issue. The claimed that his marks were still not enough. Now that is where it got me going.. Makerere University sits TWO Deputy Vice Chancellors, one finance, the other administration. The DVC (Deputy Vice Chancellor) for administration was passed with a mark of 64% and Assoc. Prof. Phillip Kwesiga, with a 64% rating wasn’t. This was confusing.

My old man, being the humble and reserved man that he is, sat down and let everything go. Disappointed in the system, he felt intellectually, making noise, never really solved the problem at hand. The post for DVC Finance was re-tendered. Seeing this injustice pass by, a colleague of his told him that there was really unfair. Why would they pass one candidate with the same mark and fail the other. The same colleague told him that overall, he was the best, that he would have gotten more marks but a few pessimists in t he system with their own candidates in mind, didn’t want it to happen.

My old man, disappointed and angered, wrote a letter to the council, requesting for senate to sit down and reconsider their position as to why the didn’t give the BEST candidate the position. Claiming that one was not a noise maker was a lot of poppycock, and how was one going to make noise if they weren’t in the position. Someone who had been first class from his graduate years till now, a leader, humble, dignified, being denied the opportunity of a life time, to lead at one of the great institutions in Uganda, Africa at large, and all you have to say is he is not a ‘noise-maker’.

Brings me to tears when the so called cream of the cream, the top dogs, the best of the best, act like foolish young children fighting for a sweet, a sweet they didn’t buy, a sweet that is supposed to benefit the students. Why oh why should old men act like young children. The same people who come to class and teach, preach actually of their excellence, attained, fighting like rabid dogs looking for a fling with the stray bitch.

The council did consider this an INJUSTICE and requested the senate to resit and ponder on the decisions they had made. Why wasn’t the best candidate chosen.  They did that today, and upon agreeing that this was an injustice, and that re-tendering the position was unfair when they had the best candidate, they decided to scrap off the position. Africans. Yes, the position for DVC Finance is no longer existent. The best candidate failed, not by his actions, but by a system that has refused to accept change. By a system full of selfish minds.

It was also brought to light that 2 years ago, when Assoc. Prof. Philip Kwesiga stood for the position, he came out top, but they felt it regional imbalance for the two top fellas  seated at the helm of Makerere University, the VC and the DVC to come from the same area, so his opponent took the position on that little glitch. Patient and humble, he bid his time, and this time, well, they blame it on noise making.

Sources say that again, regionalism/race/tribalism were the key issues. People didn’t want him in that same position. The INJUSTICE fellow Africans are throwing at others based on this is just disgusting, narcissist and shallow. Men with visions do not need tribe, race to determine their actions. Men with values do not do such kinds of things.

I am not crying out for help. I have been taught well by my father. You get what you deserve. Always work for it. Keep your values at the forefront and with time, even no one can come between you and your values. Injustice indeed. My view on the creme that lead this shattered University, well, I dont really care. Why? Well, they say that you are 90% your attitude, and if such is the case, where people fail first class thinkers, I reserve my humble thoughts on this matter.

I look forward to the time when leaders are chosen by merit, action and vision, not race, tribe and region.

I look forward to a time when previous actions tell someone’s intention.

I look forward to a time when lecturers and the senate stop acting like the failed system they are quick to blame.

I look to a time when someone is actually rewarded for the hard work and effort they put into something.

I know him a s a just man, understanding, wise, learned and educated but most of all, a great leader.

Assoc. Prof. Philip Kwesiga for DVC Finance.