Kingsman, The Secret Service

It is a beautiful movie. Very amazing in 3D I guess. I wouldn’t know because I watched it in 2D. At the end of the movie, there’s a tribute to the producer’s mother for making him a Kingsman, a gentleman.

I am no gentleman. Don’t get me wrong. I too have many short comings, but at least, I try to come off as one.

We leave in a deluded world, one that barely distinguishes right from wrong, and it keeps on getting more and more complicated when you relate and interact with people. I’ve recently come to believe that I am a push over. Maybe because I hate to fuss about some things, maybe because I believe I can take care of myself, but well, someone called me a sissy because all I did was to refuse to say no. Isn’t that what ladies want? A guy to say yes to their every whim? I don’t know. Isn’t that how it works?

In a series of events that rather left me a little emotionally emptied and frustrated, I’ve decided to put myself first. To put my well being first. The challenge albeit is when you trust and treat someone right, and hope that they too can do the same for you, but many a times, people put themselves first, something I have just most recently realized.

Don’t get me wrong, I am not saying be a douche. I am saying, be a kingsman, or whatever that means, for the greater good but also worry about your well being. For if you don’t, you come second to decisions people make for themselves, while they put their well being first. So, say no. Let those who need you come to you. Don’t be a pushover, the one everyone takes their problems to for you might end up like I was, drained, defunct and not even a smidge left for your own well being.

Never be too desperate for some shit. Never change for some shit.

Broken Promises

I find that music plays a pivotal role in mood, mine more than anyone else’s. Have you ever broken a promise? I think we all have. But why is it so hard when you break a promise? Is it because you wanted to see what you’d promised through? I sometimes slumber in my thought, quering all possibilities, and opportunities squandered, looking for reason as to why we promise what we cannot keep. Is it nature’s way of telling us how feeble our attempts are at promising what we couldn’t deliver; that promises are meant to be broken?

Church Girl

We’ve all dated one, or at least tried to date one. I don’t want to speak from experience because I do hold a deeper resentment for church girls. These treasures of God made me doubt that I too was a creation from the lord. Now, I am no relationship expert, but hell has no fury like a man scorned by a church girl.

I like the way Chimanda says girls. Nigeriany, right. I digress. Church girls are the epitome of beauty, foundation and every thing a man is looking for in a wife. When you date a church girl, your only relationship goal is marriage. Trust me, you think that far ahead even when you are just a week into a relationship.

So how did I meet church girl? Ha. Interesting. She was at a party. Right? Church girls rarely come out to party but when they do, you notice. She will be quietly seated in the corner, probably reading a book to herself and taking a glass of juice and she’ll ignore every guy’s attempt to talk to her. She caught my eye and I decided to do what every man who’s trying to get a girl’s attention at a party does, act like the craziest douche. At least she noticed. And when she did, I decided to apply my more than appealing charm to wow her. We got into it and I dare say I was smitten. That and the fact that she was an amazing kisser.

A few weeks later and we are going out. Nothing unorthodox, just two people planning their future together. Now, I am Christian, and I try my best to go to church but dating church girl made me more christian than I’d ever been. I even did bible studies. For church girl, I was breaking all odds but truth is, I was breaking myself. I was changing. I stopped drinking. I quit-ish smoking. Mehn, I upgraded myself. Or at least I told myself but church girl insisted that my ways had to change for her to accept me for who I was. Oh the struggle to change old habits. And we fought over it. And she prayed over it. Like I said, there’s nothing I wouldn’t do for church girl.

I changed. I became a better person. And when I finally thought that I had been made right for her, she’d prayed over it, and Jesus had told her I was not the right man for. Jesus had told her that I was not the right man for her? All my efforts to change and Jesus had told her that I wasn’t the right man?

I just couldn’t hate Jesus. I had changed, but my resentment for church girls has never gone away.

So I say, church girls for church boys, right. Leave the rest to Jesus.

“Boys are immature,” she said!

Hahahahaha.

Allow me another laugh.

Hahahaha. I am not going to be offended by this statement. It’s ridiculous even in its notion that young men are immature. I’ve not heard it once, not twice but so many times for it to register as an irritation every time a young girl utters it. Then again, I take no offense. I do though take offense in the person who’s spread such propaganda. A 22 year old can’t date a 22 year old because apparently, he is more likely to be immature. Granted, the status quo hasn’t changed much to support the 22 year old dude’s arguement.

I am honestly perplexed at this notion, that girls go seeking older men because guys of their age group are immature. I need to know, what makes us immature? Girls have come up with a rather bizarre notion that the right type of guy -the mature guy, will be settled, have a home and be ready to start a family. Take her home for Christmas to his parents and have very deep conversations, which apparently you can’t get from a 22 year old. It is so bad that these young girls literally lose interest immediately they find out how old you are. It is so bad that they even have their maturity age gap and brackets. He has to be 35, have a steady job and have an acceptable bank balance because that makes him look mature, be mature.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.

Are you kidding me? It is bamboozling to hear such come from girls who’ve barely made it out in the world. Girls who’ve barely traveled and seen the world. Girls whose version of a romance is in the twilight books they read. Girls whose understanding of culture barely exceeds that of what their roommate next door screams out loud during their throngs of passion. Girls whose basic knowledge of starting a family is getting a man whose already settled. Girls whose idea of maturity is so misconstrued they believe themselves mature because they carry around a pair of breasts.

I’d rather you say he’s too young, unsettled, and lacks ambition than call someone undateble and immature. Girls need to throw away these delusions of grandeur they keep feeding themselves. Illusions, created by your inability to rather comprehend that carrying such thoughts around makes you more or less immature and the young lad you called out immature, mature.

I once believed this nonsense because society made me believe that girls grow up faster and are more mature than boys their age. Fact of the matter is that there are so many precedents to support and also equally nullify this argument.

Anyway, all I am saying is that for Pete’s sake, stop using the bloody word. Look it up in the dictionary. Immature relates to things regarding to growth, and until you know that, grow those ideas and ideals lest we think your mental capabilities immature.

And for the guys who’ve been called immature, well, keep proving them right. It’s the least they deserve, right?

A Letter to My Future!

Seek…

Balance; balance is a state of being. A decision you make when you are constantly faced with many worrisome thoughts. Many times the things we fuss about are petty to others, and so is true for the things we dont care or even fuss about. The world always seeks balance, and that’s why we smile when are happy and larsh out when angry. Balance is not something taught, it’s something you seek, like a man seeking for a female companion. Balance is something you learn and need to understand and I have come to perceive much later in life that you need balance. No one will ever tell you. Or even teach you. Find emotional, spiritual, physical and financial balance if you need to succeed in life.

Attitude; this is what we choose on the inside to reflect on the outside. If we are positive on the inside, it shall reflect on the outside. Attitude is unfortunately involuntary and it’s only when you have and seek emotional, mental, physical and spiritual balance that you are able to master and control your attitude.

Solitude; it is not bad to be alone because in solace, you will need to find your inner peace. Seeking balance in life means seeking an inner solitude and finding it is the key to fully releasing and realizing your potential. Perfecting your solitude implies finding balance even in a crowd of people. Besides, you are always alone when it eventually counts.

Nature vs Nurture; nature’s way is to survive and it’s through this nature that you nurture your instinct. A peaceful mind lives for both today and tomorrow because in the inevitability of nature, you will have mastered instinct. Finding your balance allows for your instinct to thrive.

Fate; the wind blows and is shaped by the many obstacles it encounters. Blow like the wind and never stop blowing because of the obstacles that you might encounter. Move with the flow. Let your nurture take you where you need to be.

Inner Peace; with balance in your life, you will have a positive outlook on life even in your own solitude as you interact with nature because that’s your ultimate fate – Inner Peace.

May.

The year’s business end is just around the corner and I just realized that 8 out of the 8 resolutions I set out to achieve are still very behind their schedule. But, there’s hope and I am pretty sure that one day, we shall get back on track.

Well, things to do this Month;

1. Meditate. It heals the soul.

2. Work. It’s good for your mind.

3. Make new friends. This is the cheapest thing anyone can afford. Trust me.

4. Smile. Even in the hardest of times, smiles always do the trick. So. Trust me.

5. Five months down the year, have you read a book? Written down anything? Listened to something new? Change. We always need change. If you don’t accept it, well, have a lovely month then.

πŸ˜€