Random January Thoughts

1. I was going through my phone, checking my call log and realized that I need (new) friends. As much as I hate to admit it, the conversations seemed divided between my partner and my work. And that was from Monday to Monday. There was an occasional call to family but that was a rare occurrence. I pride myself in communicating but this realization is now a worry. Don’t I have friends I can just randomly talk to, share a light moment? Maybe I should add making friends to the list of my resolutions for 2016.

2. Speaking of resolutions, this year’s one have been the hardest for me. It took me almost two weeks coming up with them, before I stumbled on the ones I had written last year. And here’s the magic, composing new ones became much easier after going through last year’s. It also gave me the realization that there’s continuity and that there should be progress and growth between last year and this which is reflected in your resolutions.

3. Hunh! I seemed to have realization so many times in this one post. Anyway, we live in a time where one prides themselves in knowing, a jack of all trades and forget that we are masters of none. It’s reflected in the prevalence of social media these days and people popping of opinions like they are that learned. I rather seek to master my trade so no one can best me in it. What we end up having is pseudo intellectuals and petty thinkers. We end up on the shallow pool of knowledge, not really knowing what lies within its depths, its abyss. Don’t be like these people.

4. January like time waits for no man. And maybe it’s because I now work for myself (not bragging) but January is done. It’s just one more week and it’s done. Just like that. That and the fact that I need the elections to come and get done as soon as possible. I need busy in my life, and that’s not about to happen with uncertainty looming.

5. Oh, and lastly Happy Birthday Sagye.

The Past

Ah, the glorious past. The very glorious past.

A thought recently crossed my mind, leaving trails of a recent discussion I was having with a group of friends. Why are we quick to claim that we shouldn’t be judged by our past? This was in regard to lifestyles and relationships. Why do we claim innocence for our past mistakes mostly in relationships? Why do we seek a clean slate for the mistakes we did in the past?

This arose from the thought of whether we deserve happiness in the present yet we faulted in our past. I am no Saint but I am a firm believer that what happens in the future is forecast by what happens in your past. Most people call it karma or lessons, and thus begs the question, if you know that what you are doing now is wrong but insist because it’s in the now and you can get away with it, what happens tomorrow when it’s your past, and don’t want to be judged by it? Because yesterday is the today we will be talking about tomorrow.

We make mistakes, but forget that tomorrow the mistakes will haunt us. I have a friend whose not had luck in her relationships citing that no one really likes them, that they deserve happiness, and yet, their string of flings would light a filament. And this is done while they are in a relationship. I am puzzled. And tomorrow, they will wail about how they deserve happiness.

Life is a paradox, or so we believe. But why not live with the simple notion that what you do now affects your tomorrow, and what you did yesterday affects your now.

I am not perfect. Relationships are the hardest thing humans ever invented, or is it nature. So I try to live right, do right because I believe I deserve to get right.

I see young people frolic in their side dish extravaganzas and wonder why they claim and clamor to a happiness that is clear non existent in the future.

Oh well.