Inner Peace

Like Master Shifu spent most of the third installation of the Kung Fu Panda movie doing, finding your inner peace is seldom experienced. I mean, what is inner peace? How do you even know you have inner peace?

I think…

Have you noticed how things that would bother, irk you in the past now don’t even vex or move you? That someone said something or even thought it about you no longer has an impact on your self esteem? Have you noticed that the problems you once assumed were the end of the world don’t even come close to national security quotas? That that issue you once pondered on for months on without end seems to be like a breeze on a cold Friday morning with the sun rise in the back drop?

I think…

Inner peace is mostly finding comfort with oneself and just doing you. And I don’t mean a doing you that’s unrealistic but rather a doing you that you enjoy being you.

I think…

We find inner peace when we allow the inner man to be. The inner man – soul – gut – or whatever you want to call it is influenced by a lot, society, society and some more society. But, if you let the Spirit man guide your inner man, oh, you will start to enjoy inner peace.

I think…

I digress a little here. God is faithful. God is graceful and loving. I sometimes amuse when we shudder at God’s love for us thinking that He’s just being exceptional in that moment. I believe that to a greater extent, staying attuned to the Father allows for you to enjoy the full time excellence you occasionally experience as a miracle because life.

I think…

To find inner peace is to allow yourself to be one and a whole. Meditation, seclusion, prayer, exercising, living wholly. You need to be one with yourself. Our biggest detractors are ourselves. We always short change ourselves, our abilities, our strengths. We always want to assume we are inadequate so as to take the fall lightly when we actually fail. Nope. You need to fall. And get up, and fall again. You do it long enough and maybe you actually start to rise higher and move faster. Most times, we are afraid of falling and when we do, we are fearful of rising, again.

I mean, the Dark Knight Rose….sorry, Jesus rose!

I think…

Fulfillment in life, goals, ambition are all important. But the greatest thing that has happened to humanity is to fall in love. To be in love. Love your God, with all your heart, spirit and body. And love another, as you’d love yourself.

I think the secret to inner peace is to be one with the Spirit – God. Love your God. To love others. Your soul and inner man should invest in loving others for where there’s love, there can’t be hate. And when your inner man is loving others, the over flow simply means you are in love with yourself. Finding inner peace is to love others for it’s through loving others that you will understand how to love oneself.

I think inner peace is coming to the understanding that you were put here for a purpose and through our Creator, achieving that inner peace, gives us the strength to go beyond.

Have your found your love?

DANSK!

It’s the season for loving, and giving, and inner peace.

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Testing God!

I write this for me,

and you!

Just stop. Trust in the Lord,

With all your heart and soul,

For your Spirit is from Him.

Stop trying to test him, like you would a light bulb and start allowing Him to love on you. I find myself many times trying to see if God’s listening to my prayers. And the truth is, He does. I know so because in many cases when I feel there’s nothing significant happening in my life, I resort to the older man, the older version of me, and many times, older versions just never function the way the newer versions do.

Stop trying to test God, like you would a lake by dipping one foot in. God is the lake, like His son, we shall walk on water. We usually ask God mostly for provision, but the challenge is that we only ask Him when we need it in the now, and yet, if we were always with Him, our problems would be solved.

Just stop! Don’t!

I am a newer version!

Evolve-d

Hurt People Hurt People! – Confucius 

What is love? The answer is in 1 Corinthians 13: –

Read the whole chapter and maybe we can start to delve deeper.

And NO, I don’t think Confucius coined the term, ‘Hurt People, Hurt People’ but rather it’s the meaning behind this adage, paradigm that I’d like to share my thoughts on.

You know how a rotten tomato spoils the other tomatoes in the basket full of fresh juicy tomatoes? That’s what happens when hurt people decide to date without first cleansing and renewing themselves. It’s important that before you start a new relationship, the shackles that hold you to your past are broken, and you are free to freely love someone.

I had and wanted to quote that bible verse specifically to broaden your horizons on what exactly love is. We many times misuse the world love. Some of my favourite ones are when people use and say things like – I am falling/fell out of love? I stopped loving because? I have little love left because? for a friend, partner and confidant. It simply means that you didn’t understand what love was in the first place. Love nurtures and grows. Love makes you see the good side of people, and accept the flaws AND try to work on those flaws. It’s essential that when two people come together, they purpose their selves in learning and growing in love. Love is work. Not just a random feel of fwaaa fwaaa

And in truth it starts by understanding that your past does not define your future. Your past is your past. We should stop looking to the past to live in the future. I mean, Obama once said, how can you move forward if you are looking back? Many relationships these days focus on the past they fail -continuously to live in/for the future, and before you know it, you are back to the past with someone new.

Look at it this way. If person X hurt you, forgive – which is difficult and you can refer to previous posts, and move on. Learn from it and grow. When you meet person Y, person X shouldn’t be in the picture, in whatever way, past, present or future. Many times though, we get hurt by person X, move on to person Y still angry at person X, compare Y to X when they falter, pick the stupid lessons from X and apply them to your new Y and before you know it, Y has become X, and now Z is coming into the picture. And then X, Y, Z! I honestly hope you understand this analogy.

Eventually, the cycle continues, and now Y becomes X to another person and damn it, just stop it people. Why are we so hell bent on our past?

I know it hurts. I know you gave it your all. I know things probably didn’t work out. I know you probably messed up. I know you now have insecurities. I know that maybe what you believed was love was not what it turned out to be. Turn your life to Christ. 

I now know that everyone deserves a clean slate, a chance to become better and grow, and a NEW you, not an old version. Look at it this way, software always needs an upgrade, a better version of itself. But software doesn’t discriminate on who and what and how it can be used (love). Software (You) works on itself so that the new user can enjoy themselves and experience it better. Software (You) doesn’t look back and determine that you cannot harness its full potential, no, it allows you to fully use it the best way you can in the now (present). And it won’t judge you. Be like software, fix your bugs, have a renewed and better experience with the you. Don’t judge new users based on the old, but rather better yourself (bug fixes) so that the new user can experience something wholesome and refreshing. The past is who you are, but shouldn’t define the mistakes you make in the future. DO NOT LIVE IN THE PAST!

Love grows. Love is patient. Love is kind. Love does not judge. We need to evolve. We need to stop blaming our past for the mistakes we shall make in the future. If you were hurt, grieve, cleanse, renew, begin – afresh. This time a better version of yourself – evolved, to allow your partner experience the whole you, and not just parts of you you deem clean or fit to be used. And for Christ’s sake, don’t take out your frustrations from the past into the future, that’s how hurt people end up hurting people.

PS: We can fall out of like with someone, but before we do it, remind yourself what exactly it was that got you to like them. Most times we shall choose the easy way out, the weak way out, and look at the faults and flaws of that someone but usually that’s a reflection of what/who we are. Only weak people choose to see the weakness in others.

Double PS: If someone chooses not to see your light, don’t deem that light. Find someone who will keep that light shining bright. Find your Sunshine, and maybe the darkness in you will be as bright as the Moonlight!

Stay awesome people. Let’s always choose love. It’s not the easiest way, but that’s why we are on this earth. To love, and to love.

New Man

Something happens when you give your life to Christ.

And I mean giving the whole you, not just bits and pieces. The whole of you.

Me I’ve done that. Sometimes, I wake up wrestling with the idea that maybe I’ve not fully given in and then I am reminded of how amazing He is.

The phrase ‘learning and unlearning’ has garnered waves on the internet recently, and in a way it has got me thinking of the older me. I believe that we are here to fulfill God’s anointed purpose for us and maybe sometimes we are blinded by earthly truths, we feed the flesh and not the spirit and in turn soil the soul. It’s quite profound the things I’ve been trying to unlearn because of these earthly truths.

You don’t realize how broken you were until the light shines upon you. And then you start to see the cracks and fissures and dents all over your vase. Earthly truths are things not found in the book of life, opinions that we’ve gestated over time and these have become who we are. 

One of the greatest earthly truths I gestated was that I need to work for God’s approval. Another was that I could actually choose how I felt and what I did without Him. Another was that I could call on Him when I only needed Him. The biggest was that I could rely on Him in the low moments and forget about Him during the highs. And my personal favourite, that I could actually forgive and love without Him.

As amusing and benign as some of these thoughts are, to me, these are the earthly truths I am trying to unlearn. That I actually have to fight for a place by His side has already been nullified by His only begotten Son. That I need Him only when low is but amusing because in Him, there’s only highs. That I can call on Him anytime is but the best thing that happened to us such that I don’t just need to call Him during the tough times. What are tough times when you have Him?! And most of all, I am only but a vessel, and if He can forgive me, surely I can forgive anyone.

The hardest thing to do is forgive, and love unconditionally. It’s only when you understand that you are a vessel that promulgates  God’s love that you start to understand these two things. Like me, you and I are incapable of fully and honestly forgiving. God does, God has. 

I tried explaining to my mother the other day that it was not her responsibility to forgive her stepmother. That what she (stepmother) had done to them is humanly impossible to forgive. But, if she could just allow Christ to forgive through her (my mother), then she would find the peace she’s seeking. 

In Christ, the old man is dead, and the new man is born again, with salvation and eternal life.

In Christ, I am born again. In Christ, I am renewed. In Christ, who can stop me?! Surely! 

More Forgiving

So, yes, I wrote the email, and felt relieved, but then….bang…you meet the person and you can barely think once, sorry, twice before picking up a shotgun, forgive the dark humour.

Forgiving is spiritually tiring. Like, if you don’t honestly forgive, your spirit just doesn’t settle. And so part of forgiving is acting upon that forgiveness. And it’s starts by praying, praying for them, and praying that they are well, prosperous and happy wherever they are.

Myopic: I am, have been, and are greatly ashamed.

In the process of forgiving, I’ve learnt that I should be the one asking for forgiveness. Yes, you were hurt, but introspectively looking at it, you also hurt someone. When you stop playing the blame game, it all comes down to everyone got hurt. Your hurt is not any greater or lesser. Everyone got hurt, so whilst you forgive, get off that high horse and ask to be forgiven.

Make peace with yourself first.

We are all insecure, and some of these insecurities are caused usually by expectations. I know, we naturally expect, but in truth, coming of this knowledge has taught me otherwise. Previous relationships create tiny ripple effects we don’t realize, not until we are demanding and expecting things (old ways) to be done in new relationships. It’s time to do some spiritual healing and cleansing my brothers and sisters.

Have I forgiven? Yes. Am I acting on it? I believe I am.

And I hope you too can forgive, and heal, and please, do not try to rush the process. Jesus, calm down! Take your time to heal, and surround yourself with people who want that for you, and desire to see you happy. Cast aside your previous norms, come before the Lord and let Him work His magic in you.

God bless you, and preach love and peace, not hate.

PS: I just signed off like I was writing a Nigerian Movie.

Just!

Love!

That’s it.

Again, church was amazing this Sunday. Who knew I’d get all the catharsis I need from Sunday church? Well, God knew but hey, I was big headed enough to believe otherwise. They started this new preaching about “open secrets to a successful marriage!” Well, you can imagine I was all ears. [ Well, apply these open secrets to life in general]

First things first, just LOVE. Like God’s kinda love but we all know we can barely emulate even a morsel of that! So, try to love without holding back, not for them, but for yourself. And well, you can only love others if you love God, and through Him can you freely love one another. Does this make sense? Well, just love because God loves you.

Back to the main point here.

The first secret was : EXPECTATIONS!

*Drum roll please* DUM DUM DUMMMMMM!

When we start to expect, and when we heap expectations on others, we naturally set ourselves up for failure. You are just allowing for the other person to disappoint you. If you think about it, it’s natural to expect for things  especially from a loved one or your partner. It’s impossible not to. I had a taste of my own medicine this morning when I didn’t get a message from my best friend and partner in crime, and I worried because I expected to get one, and when I called, they were actually too busy to get in touch. It is eccentric to not expect, for many will call you crazy but when you start NOT to expect, life starts to open doors. It sets you free from all the things you’d expect and allows you to view yourself and life in a more enthralling way.

Expectations are the number one cause of issues in relationships. When you put relationships under a micro scope, most arguments, fights and disagreements stem from expectation(s). She was supposed to do this? He was expected to have done this? Why did you forget to do this? Most times when we expect, it’s not that we can’t do these things ourselves, we are either preoccupied or just just want someone to do it.

So, the first secret in a relationship and in life generally is to not expect, or rather manage your expectations. Don’t self inflict pain on yourself trying to expect things that will not be done, given or achieved when you can; firstly, do them yourself. Secondly, you can still do them yourself. I’ve heard people ask and pray about change, the power to change and if they can’t, accept that change.

Setting yourself free from expectations and allowing things to be will allow you to be free to love!

So, will you stop expecting or….

Anyway….just

Forgiving

If I had a bullet for everyone that hurt me then well, there would be many ghosts haunting me.

The hardest thing to do is to forgive. And I am pretty sure it’s not the actual forgiving that’s hard, it’s letting go of the reason as to why you shouldn’t forgive them in the first place that is the hardest. I’ve been on this three months spiritual trek and it’s been amazing, difficult and amazing. And prior to this last week’s preaching, a name kept on popping/playing at the back of my mind. It just wouldn’t stop nagging me whenever I had a moment to myself.

For the whole week prior to Sunday, I kept on wondering why the name was on mind.

So, on Sunday, after preaching, one of the key points was to forgive as a form of love. The truth is that God is Love, and so if He can love us, and forgive us, and we are created in His image, then why shouldn’t we forgive as well. And when we forgive, make sure that we have forgiven.

Among the few things that have transformed in my life since this journey began is to let go, and Let God. There was pain I was holding on to, a pain that kept on strangling the spirit, a pain that had a soul tie, a pain that I had unconsciously held onto. So when that name popped up, surprise surprise. I blamed this person for causing this pain…we humans can be feeble sometimes, share the blame or just throw it on someone, and this pain always brought about an anger that I didn’t like at all.

Back to Sunday…

So our assignment was simple, forgive that person you believed has caused you pain. And honestly forgive them. Don’t do it for them, do it for yourself. Do it for your soul. And also love or share a form of love with three random people. And thus, after church was done, I sat down, meditated for a little bit and then wrote an email, apologizing first and asking for forgiveness and forgiving as well.

No, it doesn’t just randomly go away but I know I was at peace. I had forgiven, and there was no backsies. And I felt lighter, happier. I sometimes sit and muse at how sometimes the hardest things to do give the greatest rewards. And so, I choose to forgive. And love. Never the easiest things to do but I believe they are the most rewarding.

Anywho, my acts of love;

Thanks for reading this blog. Thanks to those that share, like and comment. I sometimes are reclusive but I appreciate every click. Love you guys 😊