Refresh; Life in the Spirit

You are Spirit, With a Soul, In a Body.

This has been the teaching at church for the last few weeks.

This has sort of thrown light into some thoughts I have been having recently.

So, last evening after our MC fellowshipping, I had a chat with a friend who was in the same place I was about 7 months ago. At the time, I was asking myself who I was, and what my relationship with Christ was. I was seeking Him out. I had surrounded myself with people who seemed to know Him, had an intimate relationship with Him, and seemed to have everything together. They were truly and honestly happy. Not the false happiness we wear on our faces, hide behind our smiles, but radiating happiness.

I kept on asking myself what they had, that I didn’t! I kept on wondering what they did, that I wasn’t doing. It would hurt me internally when I saw the joy and testimonies they told when we met. I wanted that. I wanted that joy, that happiness. If Christ really was giving them that joy, why wasn’t He giving me the same joy?

Anyway, when I started this relationship with Christ, to a greater extent I thought that things would happen immediately, and that I’d be in a better place and space like my friends were. I expected much. I desired for much. Boy, I wanted what they were getting.

But then, I realized that we are different. Our understanding and relationships with Him were different. I understood that it was a journey. I knew that eventually I’d be where they were. I started to hold no grudges and slowly started to trust in Christ, and in God, and building a relationship with Him.

My personal relationship with Christ is that of an older, wiser brother who is always looking out for the younger brother. And to me, God is my parent. That’s my relationship with them. To some, Jesus is their best friend. Well, the more time I spent thinking about Christ, and listened and heard, the more I realized that God is always with us, and we are always with Him. God has always wanted us to have a personal relationship with Him.

The Bible holds the answers to all the questions we most times don’t have answers to. Last night, taking to a friend who was where I felt I was months ago, it was easy to relate and see in what state of mind he was and it was easier preaching to him.

We are here to be Spirit filled and Spirit led, and to continuously renew our minds to Christ like things. Focusing on Christ like things is to have life and peace, and to be carnally minded is death was the teaching at fellowship yesterday. And having experienced Christ in every aspect of my life these last few months has been humbling.

What is your relationship with Christ?

I know and believe that God is walking with us everyday, communing with us through prayer, and that all that you need, desire, seek in Him, you will find. Phil 4:8!

Have a lovely month!

Advertisements

July Musings ’17

  1. Praise God. Amen

    Oh yeah, blood, brother, bro, dude, mehn oh mehn, guyi gwe, haza mwana, I decided to put God first this year, in everything. Little did I know it would take me on an eight month journey that I can surmise in one word, God.

  2. Allow the idiot in you to prosper.

    What is self actualization? What is self? What is actualization? One of my favourite aphorisms is the statement, “the absence of presence, and the presence of absence” which was one of my fave arguments back in design school. Looking back, in this journey called life, there’s nothing like self actualization I believe. To be actualized means to come to a complete end, which ideally in this case would be non existence. I rather prefer to be self aware, which I believe you achieve in this journey called life – everyday. Let the inner you, and the outer you meet for a cup of coffee or tea, and talk it out, and see what’s going on, and see if you are on the same page or are in different phases of life, maybe then you can start to see life in a different glow.

  3. Ambition

    I think I’ve written about this before. One of my favourite songs I believe. What is your ambition? Like Kanye asked, is it money? is it cars? or is it hoes? Ambition is priceless, it is in your veins. You put your mind to it, anything, then you can achieve it.

  4. Β Fear

    What are we really afraid of? I love hearing 20 year olds talk about their dreams, but fear what it means to achieve them, fear the failure that comes with their dreams! If it is a dream, come on, what’s the worst that could go wrong? We are afraid to start, and worry about failure of losing even before it’s began. Cast your fears away, what’s there to lose? Are you afraid to restart? Restarting means that’s there’s progress, there’s movement! Cast your fear away, and dream!

  5. Vision

    The ability to see further. Do you have that?

  6. June

    It was an ok month!

  7. July

    One of those months that tested my faith, and I am glad I stuck to the principle. Sometimes life comes at you really fast, you don’t even have time to press the brakes. Most times when we are down, feeling defeated and really not into this thing called living, just remember the good. We are sometimes most adamant about getting what we want that when we stumble and fall, we either quit, give up and walk away! BUT, why would you give up on your dream? Take it is an opportunity to work harder, better, smarter, wiser, and be patient with yourself. For crying out loud, it took you 12 months to become a year older! Come on.

  8. August

    Is finally here. Mehn oh mehn…it’s that time of the year that gets me excited, puts me in overdrive, and well, I am excited about this. God before everything. I desire it, I shall get it, work for it, look for it, and never give up on it.

Happy new month idiots.

Spread love, cheers, and smile.

More Forgiving

So, yes, I wrote the email, and felt relieved, but then….bang…you meet the person and you can barely think once, sorry, twice before picking up a shotgun, forgive the dark humour.

Forgiving is spiritually tiring. Like, if you don’t honestly forgive, your spirit just doesn’t settle. And so part of forgiving is acting upon that forgiveness. And it’s starts by praying, praying for them, and praying that they are well, prosperous and happy wherever they are.

Myopic: I am, have been, and are greatly ashamed.

In the process of forgiving, I’ve learnt that I should be the one asking for forgiveness. Yes, you were hurt, but introspectively looking at it, you also hurt someone. When you stop playing the blame game, it all comes down to everyone got hurt. Your hurt is not any greater or lesser. Everyone got hurt, so whilst you forgive, get off that high horse and ask to be forgiven.

Make peace with yourself first.

We are all insecure, and some of these insecurities are caused usually by expectations. I know, we naturally expect, but in truth, coming of this knowledge has taught me otherwise. Previous relationships create tiny ripple effects we don’t realize, not until we are demanding and expecting things (old ways) to be done in new relationships. It’s time to do some spiritual healing and cleansing my brothers and sisters.

Have I forgiven? Yes. Am I acting on it? I believe I am.

And I hope you too can forgive, and heal, and please, do not try to rush the process. Jesus, calm down! Take your time to heal, and surround yourself with people who want that for you, and desire to see you happy. Cast aside your previous norms, come before the Lord and let Him work His magic in you.

God bless you, and preach love and peace, not hate.

PS: I just signed off like I was writing a Nigerian Movie.

Forgiving

If I had a bullet for everyone that hurt me then well, there would be many ghosts haunting me.

The hardest thing to do is to forgive. And I am pretty sure it’s not the actual forgiving that’s hard, it’s letting go of the reason as to why you shouldn’t forgive them in the first place that is the hardest. I’ve been on this three months spiritual trek and it’s been amazing, difficult and amazing. And prior to this last week’s preaching, a name kept on popping/playing at the back of my mind. It just wouldn’t stop nagging me whenever I had a moment to myself.

For the whole week prior to Sunday, I kept on wondering why the name was on mind.

So, on Sunday, after preaching, one of the key points was to forgive as a form of love. The truth is that God is Love, and so if He can love us, and forgive us, and we are created in His image, then why shouldn’t we forgive as well. And when we forgive, make sure that we have forgiven.

Among the few things that have transformed in my life since this journey began is to let go, and Let God. There was pain I was holding on to, a pain that kept on strangling the spirit, a pain that had a soul tie, a pain that I had unconsciously held onto. So when that name popped up, surprise surprise. I blamed this person for causing this pain…we humans can be feeble sometimes, share the blame or just throw it on someone, and this pain always brought about an anger that I didn’t like at all.

Back to Sunday…

So our assignment was simple, forgive that person you believed has caused you pain. And honestly forgive them. Don’t do it for them, do it for yourself. Do it for your soul. And also love or share a form of love with three random people. And thus, after church was done, I sat down, meditated for a little bit and then wrote an email, apologizing first and asking for forgiveness and forgiving as well.

No, it doesn’t just randomly go away but I know I was at peace. I had forgiven, and there was no backsies. And I felt lighter, happier. I sometimes sit and muse at how sometimes the hardest things to do give the greatest rewards. And so, I choose to forgive. And love. Never the easiest things to do but I believe they are the most rewarding.

Anywho, my acts of love;

Thanks for reading this blog. Thanks to those that share, like and comment. I sometimes are reclusive but I appreciate every click. Love you guys 😊

29

I have had a lot to write about recently but where my mind has been, even I could not dig it out. But today, I must write because today begins a transition, significantly more important, or less, because I was born 29 years ago (some still say I am 24! Thanks Kylie). As I begin this rather exciting journey, I honestly look back at some significant things that have happened in my life. Also, I feel old albeit still feeling young. Life is but a paradox! 

1. I’d like to thank my parents. Honestly, I sometimes think they look at me and wonder, is this what we made? I don’t think I have disappointed them yet, or have I? Nonetheless, I am here because of them and now that I am old, and know how babies are made, eeeewwwww mum and dad.

2. Being a first born is dope. Till you get competition, and some more, and then you just stop being relevant when the fifth comes along. Yes, I am talking about my siblings who took my limelight year after year. Those idiots surprisingly are good company till they take some of the love that was originally yours.

3. I was born on Easter Sunday these many years ago. And 3 is my fave number. Sometimes I feel like Jesus, because of my birthday. Well, my point is that 3 is my fave number.

4. I once escaped from home – Makerere, when I was 4 to go for my cousin’s birthday in Kamwokya. My mum claims, I am not too sure or even remember doing this but hey, my big head got beaten because of that. 

5. My neigbour once gave me a toy car for my birthday and after we cut the cake, this dude took back his toy car. Apparently the father hadn’t given him permission to. I know, it’s been this long but hey, I can forgive but not forget. Got circumcised too! Lol.

6. I had my first crush.

7. I once got drunk and passed out in a banana plantation at a baptism party somewhere in Nabbingo. The coke tasted different. My uncle gave me some of his punch and I was KOed before I knew it. Luckily, I woke up in time for the cake cutting. I love cake too.

8. I joined boarding school.

9. Mehn, I was still in boarding school and it sucked but hey, I had made the decision all because my cousin was given pocket money.

10. I was in a heist. Bun robbers to be precise. Our buns has been locked up by the class teacher because we were noise makers. So, I decided to take the initiative and break into the cupboard. That’s how I met my best friend, then. 

11. Boarding school had refused to end, but I was just a year away from P.7, I had to hung in there. The system had broken me. And then my class teacher comes to tell us that we shall never stop learning. This hurt, seeing as I was tired of school. Little did I know that I would understand this when I was finally done with school.

12. Finally! Done with boarding school, candidate of the millennium. And then my arch rival was born. The last of five, first of they took all the love from us! My baby brother. 

13. I thought I grew up a little here. Oh the famed secondary school level! And my passion for writing was thus ignited. I started to write in a journal. I should look up some of these journals and see where my mind was!

14. Secondary school was easy. And my innate passion for Architecture was triggered. I was rather fascinated by buildings.

15. I read my first Novel. Not sure what the title was, but it was a Sydney Sheldon book. Thought him to be a lady seeing as most of his protagonists were ladies.

16. Of crushes and love letters. Hello, CLAK! I also learnt to drive. I once stole my father’s car just to drive around the nieghbourhood before I was caught and told to write an apology letter and within it reasons as to why I stole the car! Aha!

17. Almost there. I can finally see the light. Almost done with tertiary education. Honestly, my high school was not as impressive as some people say theirs were! I was a laid back chilled guy trying to live another day. 

18. Uhm. Grown up woot woot. Honestly, it was the first time I realized that I was grown up and I could get jailed. I also went to cooking school because I had the driving thing locked down 😎! 

19. Hello campus and all the bad decisions! Very frightening bad decisions. First successful surgery! First relationship. I remember telling her we were going to get married! 

20. First break up! Who knew relationships were not as rosy as what I watched in the Notebook! 

21. Maybe Architecture is not as easy as I thought it was. 

22. Who am I and why am I here! The famed introspective question hits me. What is life? And the sickness kicks in! Depression also kicks in. There was a lot of anger in me that never seemed to have an outlet! 

23. Hummmm? Life happened. 

24. Isn’t love a beautiful thing. MMMKR!

25. The typical midlife crisis! For Ugandans that is. Isn’t adulting a trap. Got my first job as a client service personnel in an advertising firm. I was tired of Architecture and need a mental break. 

26. Maybe Architecture is not that bad at all. I also started and owned a restaurant, and also failed. 2014 was a year of many things. I also registered my first company!

27. I honestly felt I had been through a lot. Three jobs in three years and a failed restaurant, and a project that took me deep deep into the village was also the reason I needed to officially start my own company.

28. Last year was amazing. C.E.O things aside, I just realized that time is something we barely grasp, and I needed to get myself in order. I also met some really amazing people. I won’t mention them, but they know themselves. They have made my rather mundane life a little thrilling. They’ve got my back even when I fall off the chair. They’ve propped me up and reminded me that I am special. But what can I say, Lulu and Lula have really been awesome. Eve, Mark, and Justin. Robert and Marvin are the other musketeers. There’s one who went but she won’t be forgotten, Julie – we got your back! 

29. I don’t think I’ve said much, but I am just grateful for the gift of life, for the gift of family, for the gift of friends, for the gift of tomorrow, for the gift of work. The older I grow, the more I realize that the things I held most significant might not matter tomorrow but as long as I stay true to myself, and believe in doing the right thing, and giving my most, I shall be happy. As I start this new year, I don’t believe there can be a new me, but rather a refined me, from the lessons I have learnt these past few years. Like my maths teacher said when I was 10 or 11, we never stop learning. And he should have added something, we never stop growing. Spread love, peace and a little laughter here and there.

Happy birthday Conrad.

8 Years

8 Year Anniversary Achievement
Happy Anniversary with WordPress.com!
You registered on WordPress.com 8 years ago!
Thanks for flying with us. Keep up the good blogging!
It’s been a great 8 years and I dare say that my writing and the Thought Process has grown and improved. So here’s to many more.
Cheers!